My mom deserves a gold medal. (that she can sell for some cash)

Things are very quiet and slow. I don't talk to people and people don't talk to me. (apart from my mom who is my heroin!) I am stressed because on tuesday this week I am doing my last interview/meeting with the clinic that I hope will say yes to helping me with my phobia. I sometimes think though, that I could just as well be dead. I am that small on the map these days. I feel that I would be missed by very few. (my mom pretty much, so she is keeping me alive!)